PSsst! Who’s the big cheese?

By The Mandarin

May 17, 2022

cheese board
Bring cheese! (New Africa/Adobe)

Big gun on the way

In the mad rush to the polls, both leaders have extremely busy schedules, but expect a little extra something from the Albo camp before the big day.

In addition to his National Press Club address on Wednesday and the release of Labor’s costings on Thursday, the opposition leader is expected to be joined on the trail by a very special guest.

Until now, former prime minister Julia Gillard, who currently resides in London, has endorsed her party’s campaign by way of letters and video messages supporting Albo and others, such as his finance spokesperson Katy Gallagher.

Gillard did not join Labor’s other former PMs Paul Keating and (ahem) Kevin Rudd in attending the ALP’s campaign launch in Perth recently. After all, London is a long way to come.

While both Keating and Rudd definitely added star power and massive cred to Labor’s launch, Gillard was missed.

The Mandarin understands, however, that the Labor giant, whom much of the nation has missed during the turbulent Abbott-Turnbull-Morrison years, will be joining Albo on the trail in person before the end of the week. So watch this space.

Bring a big cheese to your election night party

There are plenty of pithy party guides about the best places to go and what to eat for your very cool and definitely not-nerdy election night-do this Saturday. This is not one of them.

If you are stuck on how to cater for your politically-minded friends (or maybe they’re just there for the emotional drama), The Mandarin’s tip is to trot down to the Ainslie IGA (if you happen to be in the nation’s capital). There, you can find all manner of delicious fodder for your hungry guests.

Don’t miss the well-stocked cheese aisle at this Canberran providore, where you’ll be able to buy your fill of soft and hard cheeses. All you have to do is unwrap it, serve and enjoy.

If your guests learn they have backed the wrong horse, the very least you can offer them is an opportunity to break into the market and a cheese coma. While it may be a very bougie way of taking off the edge of a raging cost of living debate, we promise this offering will go down a treat!

Just ask a certain top bureaucrat from Services Australia (and we’re talking very top), whom we saw ducking into and stocking up at the shop rumoured to supply the French Embassy with its cheese needs.

Support independent stores this Saturday. And may the best cheese win.

Hanson’s second coming – at ya

One way to get a second viewing of cartoons that paint prime minister Scott Morrison as a bogan from the backblocks is to get told by the Australian Electoral Commission to remove videos that have no written and spoken authorisation statement. Pauline Hanson’s One Nation has removed but now replaced its suite of South Park-like cartoons after a nudge from the AEC reminding it that authorisations needed to be included at the back end of these cartoons because they are a form of political communication. The folks at One Nation are complying while at the same time ensuring the cartoons are getting a second viewing. 

Standards board seeks field-testing volunteers

Road testing new disclosure rules might be a bit dry but it is necessary. The Australian Accounting Standards Board is seeking volunteers to ‘field test’ a new set of disclosure rules for climate report to see what the material looks like when it is produced by people who actually have to comply with the standards. This is done so that the domestic and international accounting standard setters are able to see what the practical compliance issues are for companies and other entities that will use the literature. There is a fringe benefit for the gurus of regulatory impact analysis in Canberra: field tests help these standard-setters comply with Regulatory Impact Statement requirements.

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